how to make a holiday card

First, you realize that even a really nice camera is going to have trouble in the dark.

Then, you think, let's go out in the front yard and build a wall out of firewood rounds to sit on.

Next, you try to get the toddler to smile, but she won't, and someone has their eyes closed in every picture.

You might get kind of annoyed.

Several adults make asses of themselves trying to make the kid smile, it threatens to rain, and you promise they can have hot chocolate later if everyone will just hang in there for a few more shots...

And then a couple of lovely pictures emerge from Mark's magical camera.

This will be the first year in memory that we have managed to get our holiday cards designed and ordered before December 1. We hope you'll like what you see in your mailbox in the next couple of weeks. We worked hard for that picture!

Thank you Mark - the Davises love you!

silver lining

I've been traveling a lot this month. A lot. I have two projects that require me to drive to Salem a few days each week (about an hour away). For two weeks in a row I was on overnight trips Wednesday through Saturday.

The kids (and Joel) suffer for it a little bit. Our family life is not a totally well-oiled machine. We really do require two parents for the many pick ups and drop offs, soccer games, sleepovers, and preschool snack responsibilities - not to mention all the filling of lunchboxes, washing of soccer uniforms, managing of homework, etc. that has to happen throughout each day.

So, yes, it's been a little crazy (and, yikes, the holidays are on the not-too-distant horizon...).

But a recent silver lining was a visit from our dear friend Kirsten. We work together at Public Knowledge, and last week my trip was to Portland for our company retreat at McMenamins Edgefield Lodge. She came home with me for the weekend. The kids love Kirsten. She has known the boys since they were one and three - we met in graduate school in Austin. It's fun to have a visitor that's here as much for the kids as for the adults - and out of town guests always inspire us to do things we normally avoid - like the Saturday Market. We ended the weekend with a walk to the park before she had to fly home to Bozeman. We miss her already.

halloween

They were a motley crew, my children.

Liam, an evil scarecrow. We found some overalls at the Goodwill, and used rafia for the straw so it wouldn't be itchy.

Milo, a white ninja. Enough said.

Lucy, a ladybug. I had a lion costume for her, a hand-me-down from her friend Jun. But she insisted on being a ladybug and another friend came to our rescue the day before Halloween with a costume from last year. Lucy got to be her ladybug and she loved it.

Lucy also loved trick or treating. She was less interested in the candy than in walking right on into people's houses when they opened the door for her.

The boys complained about Halloween being on a school night - and I agree. I have a feeling that 25 fourth or fifth graders with sugar hangovers aren't exactly productive students the day after Halloween!

nine

Joel and I went to the boys' parent-teacher conferences the week of Milo's birthday. His teacher told us that when Milo told his class he was turning nine, no one believed him. They all guessed eleven. She was quick to say that it wasn't just because he's 5'1" and 110 pounds, but also because he's well-spoken and sure of himself. He's the youngest in his class (he started Kindergarten a couple of months before his 5th birthday), but he's also at the top of his class. He is in the accelerated math group, and was just designated TAG.

Superlatives are required to describe Milo because he stands out - and his fourth grade smarts are only on piece of that. He's also known by his friends as being fun, fair, and good at foosball. He's goofy and sweet. He's a good athlete, but doesn't get emotionally attached to winning or losing, and chooses sports experiences based on how much fun he'll be able to have.

Sometimes in our family Milo gets caught in that "middle child" no-mans-land between baby and big kid. But in many ways he's also the glue that holds us all together. He reminds us to play board games and Uno in the evenings. He takes Lucy out to the trampoline or to the couch with a stack of books when she's grumpy and dinner needs to be made. He's our good natured, sweet, smart boy, and he makes us all better people.

Joel made an ice cream cake for Milo's sleepover birthday party.

Nine boys played capture the flag and watched two movies

before finally falling asleep at midnight...

tsunami

Milo, Walker, Eli, Miles, Liam

Liam's first game back after the doctor gave him the green light -

he managed to avoid clubbing anyone and scored the first goal of the game last weekend.

Once again, soccer has taken over our family's free time. For the first time ever, Liam and Milo are on the same team, which has made our lives a LOT easier. (Well, and the broken wrist took Liam out for the first five weeks...) This fall, their team, Tsunami, is a 4th/5th grade mix, and they are playing with some of their closest friends.

Tsunami is not the most competitive team in the U11 league. They've only won one game this fall and tied two. But these formerly ultra-competitive boys don't seem to mind - although they sometimes get overly-goofy, they are having a great time on the field together.

Soccer Moms

The best part for me of the boys playing with all their friends, is that I

get some quality sideline time with some of my dearest friends!

Post-game fro yo

I just posted this comment on a friend's blog who's son is just starting out with sports:

Being a soccer mom has its ups and downs. I have put in a lot of time under umbrellas and in soggy rain boots on the soccer sidelines, carting muddy boys all over town - and while sometimes I'd rather be curled up with my coffee on Saturday mornings, I wouldn't trade it. I have learned to love kids' sports. I love the triumphant sweaty faces running toward me after a game, the little thrill when someone scores a goal or makes a basket, and even the hard lessons that come with not making a goal. Sports have taught my children resilience and the interdependencies of teamwork like nothing else.

best years

Joel and I have been reminiscing about college lately. Maybe it's the fast pace of our lives these days. Or maybe the hard things that are happening to some of the people we love. I think a lot of it comes down to the many demands on our time that leave us feeling stretched thin and taut at the end of the day.

We remember college fondly, and not just because that's where we met. While maybe not the best years (I have to say, even though I'm busy, I am really enjoying my thirties), those truly were great years. We were independent, but still free of real-life demands. I remember a lot of sitting around in coffee shops reading. I remember long evenings drinking cheap red wine on a big front porch surrounded by people I loved - many of whom are still in my life. Those are the years of staying up too late writing papers, and sleeping in too late on Sunday mornings. The years when you really believe that anything is possible, and you're right.

College, for us, was about figuring out who we were and what we stood for. It was about finding equilibrium. And it was about having the time of our lives! We tried out different majors and different friend groups; learned how to rock climb and how to steer a raft down the McKenzie River. We drank too much, and then we didn't drink at all. We saved money, and then we spent it. We were vegetarians, and then we weren't. We worked hard and played hard, and we loved it all, even the hard parts.

A couple of weekends ago, my sister and I took a road trip around Oregon to visit our little brothers who just started their first year of college. Teja is in Bend, going to Central Oregon Community College and living in a funny little apartment in the woods with two other guys. They are proud of the dinners they make together, and of their Goodwill decor. None of them have cars so they bike everywhere and love it.

Kavi moved to Portland and is going to Portland Community College. He wants to be a firefighter so is taking EMT courses. He lives with his friend Chance in an apartment on a busy street in SW Portland. They eat a lot of noodles and are learning the bus routes. (Kavi is especially interested in the bus route to Lewis and Clark, where his girlfriend goes...)

We're a little jealous of them. They are at the beginning of some great years. It's true that life keeps giving us great years, and every new phase has its own beauty. I'm sure someday I'll look back on these years of having young children with nostalgia. But it's fun to watch my brothers starting out on their own, excited about what the future will bring.

summer retrospective

For all our fans, who were missing the blog over the summertime. Here's a smattering of images from our family's summer adventures.

Lucy got a trampoline for her birthday...

She turned two on July 29...

And I turned 35 a week earlier...

We had some sweet dinner parties...

Joel and I went to London for a week...

For Haley's wedding...

Milo explored his dramatic side at a two-week "Imagine That" camp, concluding with the concoction of "dirt pudding" (chocolate pudding with cookie crumbs and gummy worms)...

We spent many afternoons swimming and walking around at Mt. Pisgah...

Lucy spent time at Nonny's playing with her cousin Sylvia...

And potty training...

Rohanna, Lucy and I traveled to New Hampshire for a quick visit with our Dad's family. Here we are with our Nana...

And here's the whole group.
Overall, it was a sweet but crazy summer. We crammed a lot into it, and got to spend time with many of our wonderful friends and family. There were some hard things and some fun things, not enough sunny days (our tomatoes are all still green!), but plenty of love to go around.

surgery and smiles

The first week of school was pretty exciting for all of us here on Malibu Way. Liam went to his first day of fifth grade with a temporary cast and had surgery on his wrist later that afternoon.

Lucy went to her first day of school ever, thumb and all.

And sweet Milo started fourth grade with his signature smile intact.

Liam broke his wrist at his birthday party two days before school started. Joel took four boys to Oaks Amusement Park in Portland and Liam ended the day falling on his roller skates. Joel fashioned a temporary sling with Liam's shirt and the boys still managed to have a fun drive home and pizza before I took him to urgent care for the evening.

Turned out, he had broken it pretty badly. The fracture is in the growth plate (bad news) and part of the joint was knocked aside (worse news). He had to have surgery to reset the bones and insert a four inch pin into his wrist.

Surgery was more intense then we had anticipated. It didn't take long, but watching your child hooked up to myriad wires and electrodes, and then wheeled away into an operating room is a little unsettling. Awakening from the general anesthesia was rough, and he was on narcotics for the pain for a few days.
Instead of going to school for the rest of the week he sat in the sun on the patio and listened to Harry Potter for the seventeenth time.
But he's going to be fine (and with a few deep breaths, so am I). He went to school this week and is managing his homework easily with one arm. No soccer, no trampolining, no biking, no two-touch at recess - but we're pretty sure his arm will heal easily, and he's already chosen the spot in his room where he will keep the pin when it comes out next month.

summertime

Finally here, summertime has taken us all a bit by surprise. It hit us with a heatwave first thing, forcing us to find ways to keep our cool. Lucy has spent most of the summer to date, naked ("nakkie!"), in and out of various bodies of water. The boys have discovered a passion for a card game called Magic (think pokemon meets dungeons and dragons), so have spent many hot afternoons downstairs with their decks. But they also join us for trips to the pool, the creek, the park, the frozen yogurt shop...

Some pictures of our summertime, so far:

Nonny invested in a giant kiddie pool that keeps Lucy and Sylvia (and the dogs) happy

Fall Creek on the fourth of july

Liam

Lucy and Meredith

Lucy and Jun at Sweet Cheeks winery in the country, where we've been spending our Friday nights

No explanation needed...

graduation

My little brothers graduated from high school this month. It was a little surreal. I sat on the hillside above the bandshell in Ashland's Lithia Park, watching my brothers in their red gowns graduate from my high school. Seventeen years later. Half my lifetime ago I took that same joyful walk down the path by the fountain, to take my seat for one of life's crystalline moments. Watching my brothers in that moment I was moved for many reasons, not just for my own nostalgia. My brothers overcame a lot during the past four years to get to this place, and to say I'm proud of them doesn't quite do justice to the feeling.

My family spent the weekend all together in our hometown. We brought our grandma down from Eugene, and Shep came too. We celebrated with my brothers, spent time with their girlfriends, saw family friends, and went on walks and rides in Nathan's 1956 jeep. We went out for ice cream, and just hung out together.

And then it was done. They threw their hats in the air, gave us all hugs, and walked off with their friends to stay up all night at the Senior party.

The day afterwards we went to Standing Stone for dinner because our mom used to love to sit there on the patio some weekday afternoons with her boys, my brothers. She would drink a pint of dark beer and they would eat french fries. We made a toast in her name, raising our glasses to her, and how proud she too would be of these sweet, smart boys who we have collectively raised.

rhododendrons and baby goats

It rained all spring. All spring.

We were the third stop on our good friends Kirsten and Ryan's rainy PNW roadtrip last month. Highlights of their visit included a soggy walk through the rhododendron garden at Hendricks Park...

...feeding baby goats at Lone Pine Farm during a brief moment of sunshine...
...the Camas Ridge Elementary School end of year carnival (maybe it convinced the Smiths not to have kids), waffles at Off the Waffle, and an aerobed in our livingroom for three days (we didn't mind, but I'm sure they were glad to get back to the privacy of their tent). The rain really thwarted our efforts to get them to move further west, but we had a great time anyway.